Dear... J
I don't know if I should be mad at you for ignoring me, mad at myself for feeling disappointed or sorry that I didn't give you enough.
The thing about me is that I'm afraid to be loved and afraid to love, but given time I am capable of that. There's nothing more that I want than that.
In the short time I knew you, you made me feel something I've never felt with anyone: at home. Looking into your eyes, I had butterflies in my stomach, yes... but I felt so comfortable because you felt like home!
You have my kind of humor, admirable dedication and goals in life, your appearance isn't perfect but the imperfections somehow make them perfect... yet I held you at a distance while I stood in battle with my inner demons.
I can't blame you for losing patience, even though I'm angry that you're gone so suddenly. Hope is a stubborn thing that keeps me checking my phone every day. I gathered all my courage and reached out to you. If you decide to drop the ball then so be it.
Eventually the light you lit in my heart will burn out, taking the hurt I feel with it.