Dear... My Future Self and Present Self
I am a f**king idiot. I have no idea what to do with my life. I don't think I'm a good daughter. I don't think I am all the things my family believes I am. I don't think I'm strong. I don't think I'm smart. I don't think I'm beautiful.
What about you? Are you still indecisive as ever? Do you still put yourself down all the time? Are you doing well? What about your family? Who do you consider your family now? Do you think you love people now?
I hope you're in a better place than I am right now. I hope you've found that stability on your career front. Did you follow your heart or the rational decision? Where does my heart even lie, honestly...
I hope you were able to change countries. I hope you get to travel and sleep in when you want to. I hope you don't shoulder all the responsibilities alone all the time. I hope you've learnt how to open up… at least to the people who matter.
Has your definition of friendship changed or do you still let people walk all over you before you realize they don't belong in your life anymore?
I hope you're kind to your family. They do love you.
I.. am not good. I'm confused and anxious and depressed about my career. I like a lot of subjects and I'm not able to narrow it down to one. Can't we study all of them? We can't, right?
Dear my future self... I hope you're proud of the person you were and maybe still are. I hope you're able to talk about your likes and dislikes more often. Don't eat Chinese when you crave a pizza, Ask for one… papa won't listen but ma will. Ask her to buy that top for you if you like it. Don't let it go just because we don't have enough money right now. You do. You earn now. Buy something for yourself from your own money and don't feel guilty about it.
Don't let papa guilt trip you. He's wrong. Don't tell him that. Tell that to yourself and do what you think is right.